Depending on your situation, the next few days leading up to Valentine’s Day might be something you’re looking forward to, or an event you wish you could stay under your bed until it’s over. Or maybe you’re a little nervous because you might be just beginning to date someone and you really, REALLY want things to pop off. Every woman loves the power having the undivided attention from the man they’re into, and according to some relationships experts, you can do it, because chemistry and magnetism is simply a function of the brain. Know the triggers, get the guy.

You’ve heard all the tips–eye contact, smiling, touching the forearm–but you might not know the scientific reasons why these actions can work. Most of the carnal attraction we feel boils down to sex, and the continuation of our species. At the bare bones, men are looking for women who can bear them strong healthy babies. Women are looking for strong men who have the ability to provide and protect their offspring.

Here’s a list of things you might try, courtesy of Leil Lowndes, author of How to Talk to Anyone and Make Anyone Fall in Love with You.

First things first, men are visual. Think about it–a guy can take one look at a girl and think, “She’s the one.” What he doesn’t realize that in the tiny microseconds he was looking across the room and his beloved, his brain is assessing her ability to have his babies. That’s why men DEFINITIVELY like long hair, smooth healthy skin, full breasts, small waist and curvy hips. Men like long, shiny hair because estrogen, the hormone responsible for baby making, is responsible for that glossy, thick mane. Smooth, healthy looking skin is an barometer for internal health–if someone isn’t of optimal health, their skin will give you a hint. The breasts, waist and hips (hour glass) is indicative that a woman is fertile and NOT in menopause, which sadly, makes the waist thicken, the bottom flabby and the breasts less firm.  <<That’s only if you don’t do anything to keep up your shape. There’s an old saying: In your twenties, you have the body you were born with. In your thirties and beyond, you get the body you deserve. Keep a healthy diet, exercise using weight-bearing activities to keep your muscle tone, and you can keep that girlish figure well into your 70’s.

Exhibit A:

Ernestine Shepard, 70+, still has a great figure and a beautiful long mane of healthy, long gray hair.

Bottom line, looks do matter, but thanks to Spanx you can fudge that hourglass. “So what’s the big deal about a shapely body, you ask? Mother Nature murmurs in his ear, ‘Dude, she’ll get pregnant faster and easier and is less apt to have a miscarriage.’ A male subliminally recognizes that Ms. Shapely’s roomier hip would give his unborn progeny’s head more room to expand. To add more fuel to his firing neuron, her bigger breast signal 37 percent more estrogen,” says Lowndes in her upcoming book, How to Create Chemistry with Anyone: 75 Ways to Spark It Fast and Make It Last.