Say you were going on a journey to a place that you have never been before. One that you’ve been dying to visit. You have always been curious about going there and now have the opportunity and have worked up the nerve to go for it. So you do. You take the suitcase down from the closet and start to pack. Ah, wait a minute, what do you take? Whats more what are you going to do once you get there? What do you really know about the natives ? Are the natives friendly? Hummmmmm, better approach this trip form a different direction. Better have a plan. Better learn a thing or two before running off half cocked into what is, for you, uncharted territory. Better find a guide. That’s it a field guide. One that will show you the points of interests and point out the hazardous. Ah, but where to start? Which guide to choose? Well, since this is foreign territory with so much to learn lets not get bogged down with a whole lot of minutiae. Lets get the general lay of the land and work from there.

The “Black Girl’s Guide to Dating White Men” by Niki McElroy is just what you need. It is a quick, light, fun and easy to read guide for the black women exploring her option of dating white men. With a wry sense of humor and insight from her many years of dating experience across the color divide MS. McElroy pens a book for the woman curious about what swirling is all about and has no clue as to where to start. That said her book also has much to offer the veteran traveler since she offers a fresh perspective on what the current IR dating scene demands.

I enjoyed reading the book and kept picturing myself sitting with my girlfriends in my backyard on a breezy summer evening, a glass of chilled Chardonnay in hand talking about what women eventuality get around to talking about. Men. Ms. McElroy’s tips and advice are delivered is a breezy funny and at times irreverent style and you find yourself laughing frequently. This book never takes itself too seriously. It doesn’t need to, it is about finding the kind of guy you want to date and dates are after all fun. While the author does offer advice about what to do if the relationship takes off much of the book deals more with the where and how to meet the men your are interested in, how to develop your A game as far as clothing choices, make-up and grooming offering tips and illustrations as to what to and what not to wear, how to negotiate social and professional situations in your guy’s company as well as what attitudes to leave behind if your are moving towards opening your options and considering dating across the color line. For example I enjoyed the “Are you an Angry Black Woman?” quiz and would encourage readers to actually take it. It’s fun and you may learn something unexpected.

“Black Girl’s Guide to Dating White Men” answers the “Whats it like?” “What are they like?” “ What should I do if….” “How can you tell if they are or if they are not into you?” questions you may have about dating out. And yes the writer does talk about sex in a frank and open way. As a woman married to a White man I can cosign every thing she says in that chapter and say good job with getting the facts right. It really is that good.

The book is well written in an approachable style and can be read in an evening, or over the course of a few lunch breaks. This book is a great place to start learning about dating a non-black man giving you the information that your mamma can’t and should be in your library of books on this subject. It makes a great book club recommendation and would offer a fun evening of discussion. Just think a girls night out discussing books and talking about hot guys. What is not to like.

I give it five stars.