I recently got this note from a fan:

Dear Christelyn,

I am a twenty-three year old African American female who is in need of some advice. There is this Latino boy who I have a massive crush on. I think he might be shy because he usually does not interact with me unless I initiate the conversation. We have hung out before and in the hangout session, he was very talkative with everyone else, but was very wary of me. I want to tell him that I like him too, but I am very shy and the last time I confess my feelings to a potential crush it did not go so well. What should I do?

Thank You,

Single girl in Atlanta, GA

Okay so my advice for this type of setting is suggestion Number Two–exchange numbers on the way out. More specifically, you can strike up a conversation and ask him about his workout routine, what his favorite  machines are, etc. BUT! This is essential–you need to find out if the reason he doesn’t make a move with you isn’t because he has a girlfriend. This is easily discovered during a conversation by simply asking, “Why doesn’t your girlfriend ever come to work out with you?” And if his answer is that he doesn’t have one, grab the opportunity to get a little flirty. Respond with something like, “Lucky me.” 😉

And regarding him only speaking to you when you speak first: gym decorum has an unstated rule that members don’t monopolize another’s time with conversation. You’re basically there to work out, not shoot the breeze. Of course there’s always some wiggle room but keep that in mind when you chat. 

For more great relationship advice from Matthew Hussey, click here.