Valentine’s Day can be so stressful until you get married, and then it just becomes February 14, when your husband goes on a protest against commercialism and the forced displays of affection men all over the world have to do. But until then, you worry. Will you get floral arrangements delivered to your work that look like they were designed by Valentino Liberace? Chocolates? An engagement ring? How about the dreaded text message to announce that your boo wants to see other people? That’s classy.

When I was single and dating losers, I remember one particular boyfriend–okay a couple–who would start to act real arsehole-y a week or two before Valentine’s Day, start a fight that would carry through the holiday, and then lamely try to make up on February 15.

As many of you chocolates hold your breath as the day approaches, I’m wondering what some of you are expecting and how you’re steeling yourselves for it–whether good, bad, or nonexistent.