You can say more with your eyes that you can with your mouth, but that doesn’t mean you should just shut up and blink. You can communicate non-verbal signals to that rain-beau man through the art of flirtation, but there’s a trick to it. Stare to long, turn him off. Not long enough, he thinks you’re not interested. More on this later.

Today we discuss how to make your eyes look fetching without overdoing it like this HAM:

I'm blind! AHHHH!

The trick is to keep it subtle during the day, and amp it up a little in the evening.

BUT STOP! Let’s be clear: Here’s a little trick I learned from the makeup artist that did my headshot–before you put brush to shadow, get the red out. Red eyes can make you look old, or at least hung over. Before you take a trip down the makeup counter, pick up some Visine. I like they’re new formula–Maximum (hangover) Redness Relief:

Here’s how Visine works: it contracts the blood vessels in the eye, thus making them “whiter.”

Once you’ve got your bloodshot-iness under control, let’s get to colors. As black women, we can pretty much get away with ANY eye color, “except for white,” says Vonnie, resident BB&W beauty expert and blogger of Socialite Dreams, because white could, maybe, possibly, make you look like a $2 hoe. It’s all a matter of degree of application.

And I never thought I’d see the day, but BLUE has definitely made a comeback. And…it looks good on us. Here’s a blue palate I like:

Why Korres? This formula contains antioxidants, sunflower oil (helps keep shades intact) and evening primrose (protects against moisture loss). Yes, that first one it has white. Just skip that one and use the other three.

Or you can use this one:

It’s my fav and I use one shade of these on the lid along with an eyeliner and mascara, or all in the evening.

As for application, turns out there’s like one hundred kabillion brushes to use to get a different look, but according to Vonnie, here’s the few that are essential:

(from left to right: crease brush (goes in windshield wiper motion where your eye folds and also can be used as a blending brush); wide shadow brush (when you need to cover the entire lid), small shadow brush (for more precise application); smudger brush (for eyeline to blend into crease; angled eyeliner brush and eyebrow shaper to fill in brow gaps)

Day-to-Day Look, tutorial by Vonnie, blogger for Socialite Dreams

step 1: In order to make your eyeshadow stay on during the day or while you are shamelessly batting those eyelashes on a date, you have to use a good base or primer. A primer like Too Faced Shadow Insurance or Urban Decay Primer Potion will decrease slick oil from your lids and helps keep colors from creasing or fading. Bases like NYX jumbo pencils or MAC paint pots can provide a bit of stickiness for powder shadows to stick to or can be worn on their own as beautiful colors for your lids, especially when you have somewhere quick to go, just swipe on and blend a bit. Your finger can be used to spread this over your lid.

Step 2:

A light color on the lid with a darker color on the crease is a go to staple look. Using a fluffy crease brush will give you a beautifully blended eyeshadow look. If you have slanted eyes, then a light color on the inner half of the eye and a dark color on the outer corner will give you a more awake look and also emphasize the pretty almond shape that you have! For large eyes, darker colors will bring them more in balance with your face (think Tracee Ellis Ross).

Step 3: For eyeliner, you could make your eyes pop with a colored eyeliner on the lower lash line that isn’t the plain black or brown. A pretty copper colored liner will make brown skinned beauties glow while a dark purple liner will bring visual appeal without seeming too bright.

Sidenote about eyeliner and your health: “Your run-of-the-mill black pencil liner probably contains polyethylene [a bonding agent that can cause systemic toxicity],” says Siobhan O’Connor, co-author of No More Dirty Looks: The Truth About Your Beauty Products–and the Ultimate Guide to Safe and Clean Cosmetics. Whew. And I thought MY book title was long.

Step 4: Curl the lashes and apply mascara! I like Christian Dior, but even that fancy-schmancy mascara can clump so make sure you separate with a dry mascara brush to lift and separate.

Eyes and Body Language

Now that you’ve got your eyes decked out, time to use them. Here’s the BIG question: do you look at your target or not? Well, yes. And no.

The basic rule of thumb is that if someone lands their eyes one you for longer than five seconds, that means they’re interested, says Dr. Gilda, relationship expert and regular sage for Happen Magazine, the official e-zine for Match.com. BUT! That goes for the man. As for you, your best bet is to play demure–look, look away, look, look away. “Men are hunters. Let them hunt. Don’t cross gender roles and do what comes naturally,” she says.

Jordan Harbinger, resident BB&W cute-guy and body-language expert and co-founder of The Art of Charm elaborates: “While it’s not the woman’s job to pursue the man or initiate the interaction, it definitely helps if there’s a little trail of honey for us to follow. It’s always nice to get a flirtatious glance and a smile from a cute girl. When it happens, most guys are still too chicken to approach or do anything about it. But it’s very encouraging to those of us that do have the guts, and it can make our day, just as a compliment from a guy you’re attracted to can make yours.”