I just have to say something. These so-called pro-black militants on Facebook who “claim” they only desire the betterment and advancement of black people honestly scare me. They have so much contempt for black women, so much seething hatred and need to for absolute control that to have these folks take over black society would be like the negro version of the Taliban. Yep; they’re that scary.

Jemele Hill made waves on her Facebook fan page today when she wrote the following post:

I don’t want to paint all black men with a broad brush, but I’ve got get this off my chest.

As the situation in Ferguson continued, I saw many black women standing next to their brothers supporting and protesting with them. We understand how cruel this world can be to black men, and black women have been the biggest advocates of black men throughout history.

But Ray Rice abuses a black woman ON VIDEO, and I’m appalled that some of you — not ALL, but enough to be alarmed — continue to staunchly defend this man and victim-blame his wife, who has been humiliated and abused.I don’t want hear about Solange, Chris Brown, or anyone else — much like you don’t want to hear about why you aren’t as concerned with black-on-black crime when you’ve been the victim of racism.I honestly want to know, why are some black men so determined not to protect and support us? Go.

The post got shared over 1,600 times, with those who supported her position (both black men and women) and those who  believe Hill is a “race traitor” and “bed wench” for questioning WHY so many in the black community demand support for fallen black men but remain silent–or worse–blame the victim–when instances of violence are directed at black women. I will not reference which pro-black, militant group called Hill these horrid names, because the individuals who run it are not beneath threatening individuals who cross them. Many of these groups are run by megalomaniacal sociopaths. And this is why black women need to start putting their needs first. I am unapologetic about telling black women to STOP muling for a community that only wants to BLEED, and BLEED, and BLEED their women until there is nothing left. This is why, no matter how much you march, how much you pray, there will be people in the community who will STILL hate you, but RESENT you because the still NEED you. When will you refuse to stop laying down to get your neck stepped on? Go toward supportive communities beyond racial lines. Let the criteria for entry in your circle be a genuine CONSIDERATION of YOUR needs, feelings and desires.

I am so disgusted at the amount of utter contempt some folks in the community have for black women, but in turn NEED them.  Too often, the black community will galvanize over an external threat, especially if it involves a white person, but they hear, see and speak no evil when it comes to the horrors we inflict upon each other. And frankly, the utter contempt that so many black people (male and female) have of black women has become so palpable and flagrant, more and more black women are beginning to question their willingness to open more veins for a community who believes a black woman’s place is beneath the foot of a black man, who has it firmly planted on her neck. Wake. Up.

On another note, I need to make clear that not every black man is with blaming black women for getting themselves beat up. Shared over 2,000 times on Facebook as a post by Julian Long, who said this:

Black men. Fellas. Brothers.

I need you to stop complaining about Ray Rice’s (much deserved and yet woefully insufficient punishment) RIGHT NOW.

When we – Black men are beaten, slain, left in the street and otherwise persecuted our sisters, our mothers, our women stand for us with nearly unilateral unwavering support. They march for us. They cry out our names and demand justice. They support us in our moments of quiet fear when we shed the bitter shameful tears of self-doubt and fatigue. If you cannot find it within you to get over your idol worship and stand up for our sisters when they are being abused and mistreated then you need to spend some serious time in reflection.

STOP looking for reasons to diminish Ray Rice’s actions.
“Well…it couldn’t have been that bad. She married him.”
It doesn’t matter.

“She should know he’s a big man and if provoked he’s gonna hit back”
It doesn’t matter.

“She charged at him”
It doesn’t matter.

“She hit him first”
It doesn’t matter.

“He’s trained to hit. He can’t stop it. It’s a reflex.”
Are you f*cking kidding me. That’s absurd and even if it were true IT DOESN’T MATTER.

When you say these kinds of things – when you look for ways to go easy on Ray Rice when you claim he’s “already been punished” you do two things – first you tell black women “Your lives and your sense of safety have less value to me than the recreational sports entertainment I watch ritually.” You tell the women who stand for you- cry for you- demand justice for you ––”thanks for all that but don’t mess with my game” You deny them any hope of feeling safe with you. You reinforce the perception that they are ALONE in their struggle. Which in turn signals to those who would further victimize them (you know- general society that places Black women at the very bottom of valued humans) that they are free to move at will.

The second thing you do is – and this is irony – you borrow from the script of people like supporters of Darren Wilson. Let’s compare notes…

“He shouldn’t have been in the street”
It doesn’t matter

“He should have listened to the cop”
It doesn’t matter

“They say he stole so he was in the mindset to resist arrest”
It doesn’t matter

“Cops are trained to shoot to kill. He couldn’t help it it was reflex..”
Are you seeing the terrifying parallel? IT DOESN’T MATTER.

Brothers. Recognize wrong and stand up for what’s right. Whatever happened between them and whatever they did to patch things up is irrelevant to the fact that no man has business hitting (let alone knocking out) any woman over a spat. He should regard the use of his body against her as lethal force and exercise restraint above all else.

Also stop sipping your damn tea.

IT IS YOUR BUSINESS

When one of our sisters is hurt, abused or in peril it’s OUR business. Because when somebody has us jammed against a car with 5 or 6 weapons drawn at us they sure as hell make it their business to monitor record and speak out. They throw themselves in peril to see us safe –– and you can’t manage as much as a a supportive facebook post?!

GTFOH. I mean it. we don’t need that sh*t in our community.

But of course, black men who actually DARE to defend black women and decry abuse often have their sexuality questioned, and are called simps.

This is evidence that we CAN NOT all be one. We can not join hands with individuals who have open, vicious, and sadistic CONTEMPT for black women simply because they are black! There are too many groups of folks in the black community who are UTTERLY DISEASED. They are beyond reasoning with. Practice discretion in your social circles. Demand reciprocity of respect and concern. If YOUR needs are never at the forefront, then YOUR NEEDS are irrelevant. Are you okay with that?