Take a Cue From Him

For those of you with available males around, and the wherewithal to trust him, why not let your male counterpart dress you? Does he often compliment you on a certain look, or a certain article of clothing that you don’t often wear? Yes, wear that again, and dress it up for a night on the town with him.

No need to announce it, just do it, and enjoy that little boy grin that he will have on his face for the remained of the week.

Are you bold?

Great, provide him with your sizes and send him to the mall to pick out some new items for you. If he’s shopping with you, ask his opinion and consider what he says, his perception may give you a new point of view on colors, or clothing cuts that you hadn’t before considered. Dressing in a way that pleases another person’s eye is not taking away your power as a woman, its extending it, because once you have a new look under your belt you now have new tools to control the eyes of others.

Don’t play the game where you point out other woman use them as examples of what he would like you to look like. Your cruising for a reason to get defensive and fight him over your insecurities.

Do ask him how he likes for YOU to look, and listen objectively, and consider what is said. His opinion are about alternatives of you, and not changing or re-making the “you” you, and its up to you to follow through or not.

No one is the boss of you unless you allow them to be…(marinate on that)

Wear a Men’s Tee Shirt Instead of a Blouse

The next time you get dressed in your trusty pants(or skirt) suit why not do something outside of the box? Rather than wearing the blouse that you normally would here are a few ways you can easily give that old look a new spin:

Wear a men’s tee shirt, neatly tucked in, beneath a tailored jacket in stead of a blouse. V-neck tees are the easiest to work with and look the best on people with breasts. Buy a pack in the kids section and save money. The snug fit will be perfect for a female form.

Be bold: These shirts come in many colors and are very versatile. Use them for sleepy time in stead of a big old tee.

Infuse men’s wear into your life:

Wear a men’s watch instead of a woman’s watch. The chunky size of a men’s watch will give the same impression as a large bracelet would.

Wear suspenders. There’s never a real need for a woman to wear suspenders which makes it the perfect reason to wear them anyway. Unexpected and eye catching!

A men’s hat is the perfect cover up for a bad hair day or protection from rain and wind.

Sport a New Color That You Hate

Yeah, you have a long list of colors that you hate, and guess what? Those colors don’t know why you hate them and they would really love to be your friend if you’re willing to call a truce and try again.

Every woman has a color she hates. She swears the color is evil and adds a million pounds, or too much attention, or Jesus kicks a kitten each and every time she wears it so she can’t possibly risk such a thing. She’s sworn off the color ______________(fill in yours) like the plague.

Tsk. Tsk. Tsk……

Each and every color is your friend. There is no such thing as bad colors. There are bad cuts of fabric that pinch and hang from your body improperly. There are preferred styles and materials, but not bad colors.

Choose one: Yellow, Red, Watermelon, Burnt Orange, White, Lime Green, Turquoise, Pink, Baby Blue

No more: Black, Brown, Gray, Khaki, Denim, Maroon, Dark Green, Dark Blue, Purple

You can start small and work your way up to larger things. Buy a pair of earring in a color that you ‘hate’ and hang them somewhere that you can see them. The next time you get dressed to go out somewhere social you are to wear that new color out and see if anyone notices. Pay attention to what is said, say thank you, and nothing more. Decide if you will do that color again, or maybe move on to another color you ‘hate’.

Be bold: Wear animal print with a bold color. Be prepared to be stared at, and not because you look bad, either.

Take a new way home from work (Change your travel routine)

I was going to school full time with a over load schedule of 18 credits (6 classes), working full time (and overtime) as a paralegal, and working part time as a volunteer to gain experience in my field. My feet would hit the floor and I would be running until my head hit the pillow at 11 PM each night. I had no time to meet new people, and no time to catch up with old friends, I was living on autopilot for many years so I’ve been on the treadmill and can relate.

I would normally be where I was supposed to be at any given time because I had no choice. But on certain days when the bus would depart early and I would have to take the next one, or when class was cancelled because the professors have lives too, I would find myself outside of my normal commuting routine.

With time on my hands, or at least a few spare moments needed to figure out my life without my ‘autopilot’ routine, I would turn to locate coffee, or find someone to ask a questions of.

Turn a hall way, and walk a few paces and I’m looking into the face of someone I haven’t seen in years.

Why not have my coffee and catch up with a bestie from 4th grade? I mean, late is late, isn’t it…what’s a few more minutes gonna do to me?

I would stay and exchange info and gather info. I can find out about a new job, or a new school, or an apartment that’s now taking applications in a neighborhood better than my own.

Take the NJ Transit train instead of the Path train and find myself being chatted up by a new guy that I would not have otherwise met had I not changed directions unexpectedly.

Is he giving you eye contact? Is he cute? No ring on his finger? Looks white collar? Okay, now what? You won’t be here tomorrow to hope that he gets up the nerve to speak. Find yourself next to a cutie chatting you up and you can decide to walk back into your life or you can bring him with you.

How do you do that? Offer him a business card or take his, its the most passive aggressive form of flirting under the sun.

You were here by accident and you can’t recreate chance encounters.

Create your own opportunities by traveling outside of your comfort zone. Take a new way home once a week after work, set aside time to wander and discover what you might not know is there.

What do you see? Who do you see? New places to visit, book stores, a coffee shop? Take notes. Use Foursquare to record the location and look up tips and reviews from other people who are nearby.

Find a laundromat near the uppers, and visit there to do your dainties.

I mean, don’t bother to bring the whole entire house loud of clothes with you, your not here to do laundry exactly. You’re here to look, and not to toil, Ma’am (see #1) and when someone asks if you need help.

The answer is always, “yes”, because I said so.

What are some other ways in which you give your routine a** kicking?

I spilled my tea….. now its your turn!