Last night I called my mom, because I wanted her to listen to this, and since she only has a rudimentary understanding of the “innanets,” this was probably the only way she would catch wind of the fart cloud:

UPDATE: So I here the video was removed. What bull donkey. Luckily the savvy girls at Madame Noire summed it up nicely in text:

From Dollar’s sermon: “When you have a wreck you expect for God to forgive you and everyone else. Don’t let the preacher have a wreck, now. Then you become self righteous and you become judgmental and you’re gonna leave the preacher for his wreck when you done had more wrecks. That preacher’s still anointed to do what he was called to do. He just had a wreck. The blood will take care of his issue just like it will take care of yours.”

You can also catch the news here and here.

Not to worry, I’m sure the video will pop up again somewhere. This is the digital age, these pimps better be on notice.

UPDATE: Video is back up. SEE! I told you.

Bishop $$ urged all of Long’s defected followers to go back, because he didn’t want them, and Long is “his friend.” One commenter summed it up nice:

Intentionally manipulating young men to his personal sex paradise makes this criminal, not a wreck. And the church standing behind and supporting him is an embarrassment. No better than the Catholic church supporting priests. If these victims were young girls I wonder what the response would be? This is a mirror of how we shield child molesters in most situations, won’t confront them and brush it under the rug despite full knowledge that this shit does permanent damage.

Back to my mom. Age 71 and a widow, she loves Creflo $$’s church, and has written hefty checks to pay for all those custom-made suits he wears. I thought, HEY! My mom watches that guy religiously. I know she wasn’t kosher with the whole Eddie Long scandal, so I thought this might shake her out of the “prosperity pimp” fog she’s been in for the last decade.

Lawd, no. After she listened to this charlatan, she simply said, “What would Jesus do?”

HEY-SUS take the wheel, because black American people are some of the most easily-persuaded, regressive, un-critically-thinking group, and I dare say that the traditional black church is a key component to perpetuating the ignorance and misery of its people. My mother is one of the brainwashed, so this has a particular effect on me. When she defended Bishop $$ and Long under the guise of “forgiveness,” she lost 15 cool points and 100 minus points of my respect.

But take this line of thinking into the realm of interracial relationships, and you can see the resemblance that precludes black women from putting themselves and their health first (church beats us senseless that we’re supposed to be selfless and long-suffering), we’re to let men lead (no matter how destructive, stupid, arrogant, selfish, infantile, homosexual, narcissistic, sociopathic or psychopathic they are. That’s why it’s OKAY for black men to date and marry interracially, and black women can’t just sit down in a pew and have somebody’s baby, all the while praying until she turns to a skeleton, then a pile of dust while she “waits on the Lawd” to send her a purple unicorn with pink polka dots and a cotton-candy tail.

I don’t know why I bothered to argue with the brainwashed, but me and Mom’s were ping-ponging back and forth about the issue, and then she asked me, “Well, are you a Christian?”

I thought about it. I rewound what it meant to be a “black Christian” in America. How we have more churches on corners in any other racially segregated neighborhood, yet violence is in the black community war zone continues. I see 73-90+% (depending on the area) of black children born out of wedlock, low marriage rates, high infant-mortality rates, perpetual poverty, and all the while prosperity pimp preachers are telling people to give up their welfare money so they can go to heaven.

Then I told her this:

“I’m not your kind of Christian, Mom. So no. I guess I’m not.”