This conversation came up when me and Janice Littlejohn, my writing partner, were driving home from the Los Angeles Times book fair. We were whizzing down La Brea and saw a billboard of Idris Elba and I mentioned that in an alternate universe, where people rode unicorns to work and Twizzlers and gum drops were nutritious, and having a paramour was mandatory, that man could and would get it.

Janice has a fancy background in television and movie reporting and she’s interviewed him before he got all famous and stuff. I asked her how, as a single woman, she was able to sit across from him without thinking about how he looked like naked, covered in melted butter. She laughed and said something about ethical reporting, but I stopped listening because I was still thinking about Idris. Then I blurted, “He and a handful of others would be on my ‘short list,’ you know, if it ever came to that.”

“Came to what?” she asked.

“You know.”

She became a bit coy about it. “No, I don’t.”

“When the world decides to completely revolve around me,” I said.

I don’t know what it is, but black people with British accents are so odd sounding to me…but a good odd.

So there’s Idris, but of course, we’re talking lists here, so there’s more, and changes almost daily:

This one is a DEFINITE, unmovable short-lister:

GERAAAAARRRRDDDDDD!!!!

I’ll just pause for a second so you can take in all that deliciousness.

And then…

Aston!!

Daniel Henney