Over the last couple of weeks, I have faced what has become commonplace at my position–betrayal. It has happened so often that my husband and I joke about it. Betrayal coming my way is not a question of when, but who, and what form it will appear.
Because I’ve gotten knocked around a time or two and I’m a pro, I want to share one key bit of knowledge when it comes to protecting yourself from opportunistic people who smile in your face with a dagger hidden behind their back.
You. Aren’t. Special.
Anyone who has dated for any period of time knows that men can be very good at making you feel special for the time in which they are trying to gain something from you–whether it’s sex or money. He will say you’re the best cook, best lay, best looking, most faithful woman he’s ever met, never mind that string of disastrous relationships that follow him–because none of them was his fault. Every other woman before was dumped because they did something unforgivable to him, but now that he’s found you, it’s all come together. After only three weeks of dating, he’s telling you he loves you and wants to move to your place to prepare for marriage.
You’re so enamored and flattered that of all the fallen femmes, YOU are the one he chose. YOU are sooooo special that this time…THIS TIME, he’s found the one, and all will be well. Never mind what happened before, because it wasn’t his fault anyway. Three months later he’s telling you he was all wrong about you and you’re just like all the others. He leaves you heartbroken, bankrupt, and with a bad case of herpes.
Just look at Khloe Kardashian, who gave birth to a baby whose father started dating while he was cheated on another woman while she was pregnant with his child. I’m sure she thought she was special too, and it was really the girl’s fault he cheated, and she understands him better and like he said, “It’s meant to be!!!” Too bad that now she’s given this man immortality and a legacy he didn’t deserve, he’s now been caught cheating with yet another bubble-bootied girl while Khloe lumbered into labor.
She thought she was special too. Turns out she wasn’t.
While everyone has experienced or witnessed these train wrecks of delusion with the male/female dynamic, what is less explored is how it manifests itself with the girlfriends in your life. If you have or will ever have something…ANYTHING that the female sociopath has, the same dance of seduction is done, and it’s best to head it off before she leaves you bankrupt and heartbroken. Both male and female versions are ‘relationship locusts,’ who will feed and lay waste to your resources until there is nothing left, only to move on to the next target with no guilt or shame.
More on this in the upcoming days in my EURweb column.
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