Over the passed few weeks I’ve had multiple messages in my inbox about up-and-coming social media celebrity, Jacob Mason–a pretty gorgeous looking white guy who isn’t shy about professing his love for “chocolate girls.” With 96k fans on Facebook, it looks like most of his compliments are being well received by black women. However, there’s a small but vocal minority who are mouth-foaming and downright OUTRAGED that this man is professing his love for black women, and of course the “F word” is being freely thrown around, and some crazies are even sending him death threats.

Wait…

Folks are sending a man death threats because he says he loves and appreciates you? For me, that shows that sad, sick truth about how some of us black women view ourselves in society as truly unloveable by men outside of the black community, and believe that a non-black man who shares such a positive view of us must be defective in some way. Because…who in their right mind would think we’re amaze balls, except some freak who locks black women up in the basement naked and attached to balls and chains??

The zeal in which I am observing haters of this man jump on the bandwagon is quite curious indeed, considering that many of these same black men and women were fighting to justify their support of the NWA biopic that has done more insidious and pervasive damage to the image of black men and women that the fallout is still falling. I also find it strange that these same folks wringing their hands about Jacob Mason are probably the same folks that want to defend (or at least forgive) the massive out-of-wedlock rate and mass abandonment of black children. Hmmm…interesting.

It breaks my heart that so many black women can’t simply take a compliment without feeling the need to dissect the motives of the person giving it. Somebody says the group of women you belong to are the hottest? Don’t get mad! Flip your locs or curls, bat your eyes, and keep it moving. It’s really that simple.

Ladies, please stop being so short sighted and easily distracted. Compared to all the issues black women have to face on a daily basis, concerns about Jacob Mason’s motives shouldn’t even be on the list. We have much bigger fish to fry, and the machine that continues to degrade, dehumanize and diminish our image is going strong and sometimes, completely ignored by the same folks organizing lynch parties for Jacob!

Some have said that he has an ulterior motive with his black-girl-love professions because he’s about to launch an interracial dating site. And my answer to this is…SO WHAT?? I’d rather put coins in the purse of a man who is elevating me than in one that wishes to erase me or relish in my annihilation. Priorities, people. Priorities.

It looks like some of my You Tube followers get it, and this quote especially stood out to me:

“We have to call a spade a spade. I know black women aren’t a monolith, but we have had some of the same experiences that is why we need to support each other. But I digress. Some of us, not all, started our lives out with fathers who were physically not there, emotionally unavailable, or abusive. Some of us, not all, have experienced boys and men in romantic relationships who did not have integrity and played games. Some of us, not all saw our brothers, uncles, friends specifically set out to use women. And some of us, not all have not had many platonic male relationships so we really don’t know how men think. I am saying all of that to say that some of us, not all, have not had much love from men so it is foreign to us. We have got to open ourselves up to joy, stability, happiness and love regardless of the package it is delivered in.”

And I love this quote from a guy sub:

You best believe that your REAL enemies are DELIGHTING in some of us who refuse to accept the admiration of others, because that means that they have done their job. They have now convinced you that no one wants you, and if someone does, surely it is because they are defective in some way.

When will we realize who and what the REAL problem is?