If you were a kid growing up in the 80’s like me, when you think of Newtons, you think of figs. My parents were notorious for stocking the shelves with lame after school snacks–packaged oatmeal cookies so dry they crumble in your hands, pig skins (yes, you read that right), sweet pickles (the most disgusting food invention ever; pickles should never be sugared), sardines and saltines. So the most appealing to me were the Fig Newtons. And unlike the crumbly oatmeal cookies, the Newtons were soft, except for those little crunchy fig seeds that added some texture to my discriminating palate.
Bit of worthless trivia: I never actually saw a real fig until recently. It looked weird not sandwiched between that soft envelope cookie-thingy.
Now that I have kids of my own, I am determined not to stock our snack pantry with sugar pickles and sardines, and I’m always on the lookout for healty-ish snacks, not loaded with sugar, with some healthy stuff thrown in, preferably hidden pretty well because my kids are notorious for discovering covert healthiness and chide me for insulting their intelligence. That’s why I didn’t want to come on too strong with presenting Newtons Fruit Thins Banana Drizzled with Dark Fudge. Yes, the fudge provides a good cover, but could it deliver? I mean, it’s not completely unhealthy and therefore should be attractive to the child, right? I worried for nothing. The Boy took one taste and moaned. His big sister, who is a more sophisticated discerner of hidden healthiness and who is hard pressed to say ANYTHING is better than just “okay,” took a nibble, then came back for a few more, and then some more, all the while insisting that they were just “okay.” You’d think they’d be more grateful to not have to snack on sardines and saltines. Kids today.
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