By Alona Ballard

Janet Jackson’s upcoming wedding to Qatari billionaire Wissam Al Mana  has the whole world talking. It appears that the beloved little sister of Michael finally found true love — in the arms of an Arab man. Her fiance is equally smitten, telling the magazine Harpers Bazaar Arabia, “I’m fortunate enough to be dating my dream woman.”

While the “Thats the way love Goes” singer’s relationships will always make headlines, I’m here to tell you that similar pairings (of the non-celebrity ilk) are alive, well and thriving.

First, a little about me. I was Born and raised in Cincinnati, Ohio, a graduate of Howard University class of 1999 who switched careers from TV news to licensed teacher in 2008. The education field, like many others, has not fared well in this austere economy. With the district I worked for continuing to lay off teachers, my prospects for full time employment looked dim.
Never in my wildest dreams would I have thought that I would one day teach overseas.  I called the guidance counselor at my University, exasperated with fatigue from the job search and asked, “Is there anything I haven’t thought of?”
In fact there was.

In September 2010 I packed my bags (just 2 because i couldn’t afford any extra fees–I was broke) and flew to Abu Dhabi, United Arab Emirates, an oil-rich Sheikhdom embarking on an education reform that sought to put thousands of native English speakers in their classrooms. I had just $50 bucks in my pocket- borrowed from my sister.
Before leaving I had done my research on the country’s history, laws and culture – but nowhere online would you find anything that answers the question, “what do they think of black women?”
Before moving to the Middle East I had had little contact with Arabs. Where I grew up they were just the brave men who ran the gas station or corner store. Not anyone I could count as a friend or even an acquaintance. I had NO preconceived notions about the Arab community in the states or abroad. I judge people individually and as a black woman, know what it’s like to be unfairly stereotyped in the media.
Nothing a sister could do on reality TV could ever invoke as much blanket suspicion of an entire ethnic group like the events of September 11th 2001 did to the Arabs.
My first encounter with an Arab man was shortly after I arrived. I was still housed in a hotel (5 star no less – a sista made a come up!) and was standing at a bus stop heading to the grocery store.
Soon a shiny champagne colored Lexus stopped in front of me. “Do you need a ride?”  There he was, a man in traditional attire- the long white garment known as a kandoora and the accompanying headdress.
“I didn’t know you talked to us,” I said.
Now you’d have to be a fool to do this in most places- but in the United Arab Emirates – a place where giving someone the middle finger will get you a court date- I felt safe getting in his car.        He dropped me off at the store and asked me out for coffee. From the experience with this gentleman and others- and I can only speak from my experience – I feel that I can safely say that Arab men make a good partner because they are devoted family men who are generous, hospitable and *bonus* appreciate a curvier physique on a woman. In addition, I can say that many are high achievers who value education and business acumen. Most are Muslim and you may find their strong relationship with God attractive.
Side note- inter-marriage between Muslims, Christians and Jews is permissible in Islam without the wife converting. One thing PROHIBITED by Islam is the judging of others by skin color.
Now naysayers of my preference of men will cite stereotypes seen and heard in the media-  The Arab man as a domineering mate with a repressed woman, forced to veil her face, resigned to the fact that her husband can marry up to four wives.
From my perspective, the aforementioned situations do occur- but are the exception, not the rule.

Dating an Arab man may or may not include the following- holding out on sex until marriage and not meeting the family until an engagement is announced.

Several African American teachers have moved to the UAE, Egypt, Oman and Saudi Arabia..lured by generous salary and housing packages..and we’re not hurting for a date.

If you’re up to it, I would advise all my fellow African American women to consider following myself and Janet and “get your Princess Jasmine on with your very own Aladdin.”