EVERYBODY knows I am no fan of Jay-Z. Besides the fact that he looks like one of the characters from Bill Cosby’s Fat Albert…

…he’s done a lot of sketchy things in his hardscrabble life to gain success, including stepping on the necks of black women to become the kabillionaire that his is today. But, I must give credit where it is due.

He put a ring on it.

I’m just back on vacation in the deep woods and EVEN I HEARD that Mr. Jay-Z and Mrs. Beyonce have a bun in the oven. Fair play to them.

And like Clutch mentioned, I hope this will give the numbskulls and knuckleheads out there some cud in which to chew.

The met.

They dated.

They married.

They conceived, in that order, respectively.

And Beyonce, though not in any way her own doing, realized what a prize she was and she used it to her advantage. She is also no fool–her mother AND father made sure of that. She’s one of those girls in high school that all the popular guys like and want to date and snog with, but unlike other girls, she’s not so desperate for male attention that ever feels the need to degrade herself to get it.

Here’s a hard truth: In the black community with all it’s dysfunction and colorism, Beyonce is a prize. She’s the closest thing a keep-it-real black man can get to a white girl and still maintain his respect and street cred. Think I’m being harsh? Is home-wrecker Alicia Keyes married to her baby daddy?

Now look at the flip side. Is Lauryn Hill, beautiful, dark sister that she is, married to the dude who at least helped make five out of six of her kids? Jill Scott maintains her blind black-man worship while contemplating man-sharing al la Twitter. I was never good in math, but even a chick with her brain atrophied can see a pattern here.

Now back to Beyonce. Say what you may about her and her music, but she’s got a genius brain under that blond lace front. She did what women have done for ages and ages. She used her natural-born assets and worked them to her advantage and got what she wanted. This isn’t some Machiavellian plot, but simple, good ‘ol common sense. There’s no judgement here about the Mrs. doing what she did–she had absolutely no say so in how she would be configured upon conception, but smartly worked them to get resources, protection, security and kids who all have the same last name.

So…does this mean all the rest of us are doomed unless we make some serious investments in bleaching creams and yaky? Well…you might if you’re looking to bag a baller like Jay Z, because let’s face it–he is also acutely aware of what resources and power he brings to the table, and thus, and fugly as he may be, he can demand his prize. You can complain about this until you’re blue-faced, but it won’t change what T-I-IS.

Now here’s the good news. If your prince charming IS NOT a pimp, attempted murderer, rapper, baller, or anything that smells close to thug, then you’re in right good shape. Dark girls with kinky hair are NOT THE PRIZE for balling black men, and…SO THE EFF WHAT?! You’re only shite out of luck if you are illiterate in wall-reading. Many men of all shades of melanin think someone that looks like Lauryn Hill is THE prize. It was her failure to identify which type of man would prize her, and probably her stubbornness and keep-hope-alive pathology that hamstrung her from using it to her advantage.

Check out SJ’s Passport, Beauty as a Weapon series.

So what’s the lesson? Stay AWAY from the blond hair bleach and lace fronts and take a thorough assessment of your assets. Beautiful, non-Beyonce looking black women are coveted by many, many men. Just not particularly in the BC. Which is no big loss to me as far as I’m concerned.

How about you?