I’m just going to come out and say it–well…I already did, but I’m saying it again. Black man, you are not a king just because you are black. Black woman, you are not a queen just because you are black. The term is SO overused as to become meaningless. Plus, if I hear one more black woman or black man say a wife must “submit to her king,” I just may vomit, eat it, then vomit again. I’m serious.

Case and point:

I’m sorry, but I think the fact that Mo’Nique is rich and famous MIGHT have SOMETHING to do with the fact that she’s married. Married to a man that she candidly told the press that him cheating wouldn’t be a “deal breaker” for her. Of course she hasn’t strayed, but HER KING can do what he likes. What the Eff with a dash to cussity cuss cuss.

I’m happy that Mo’Nique has made a successful career for herself, but when it comes to relationships, I believe her mindset is deeply flawed and contributes to the crippling of black women. Because according to Mrs. Mo, your husband, if you are lucky enough to get a black one, could be uneducated, toothless and do so much cheating as to be pocked with venereal disease, is your “king,” and you must submit. I call B.S.

I’m married, but my husband is not “my king.” If, married to a non-black man, I said some silly crap like that to the guards of ALL THINGS DARK AND LOVELY, they would foam at the mouth. I could see it now: A white man is YOUR KING?? You self-hating wench! Get a divorce immediately and go have Ray Ray’s baby so we can make some more African Kings!

My husband is my partner, not my king. Yes, I do defer to him, let him know that I respect and often defer to him to make major decisions about our family (e.g. how much of a mortgage we can afford, what our monthly budget is, and if he wants sex, I’ll rock his world (that is, if I’m not too exhausted after trying to take over it). But can he cheat? Do I bow down and submit? Sorry folks, his ego doesn’t require that kind of self-humiliation. And if he cheats, he’s gone. Guess Mo’Nique left that part out of her wedding vows to “Mr. King.”

And don’t give me that crappola about how we people from Africa are all kings and queens, because if we go over there right now and declare our “birthright” we’d be laughed right out of the mud hut.

And lastly, if every black person is a “king” or ‘”queen” who the hay-ell are these jokers?